Monday, February 15, 2010

664 Bill's Ill

664 Bill's Ill

Regular readers and listeners know this space reveres Bill Clinton. Here's a guy who can be doing the Sunday Times crossword in ink, while simultaneously having some fun with a woman under the desk and talking on the hotline to Moscow about upcoming weapons negotiations. They don't make a lot of guys like that. And this one's a keeper.

Love him, yes. Trust him? Not in one particular context. The President recently underwent another heart incident. They put a couple of stents in one blood vessel to open it up. Okay. Happens every day. During all the folderol, the President's cardiologist, Allen Schwartz, said this whole thing had nothing to do with the man's lifestyle -- and that he'd been toeing the line since his bypass in 2004.

Oh, really?

The President's home is in Chappaqua, New York. Therein or within a very few miles are a McDonald's, a Taco Bell, a bagel cafe and a fist full of other similar joints. And where there's a McD's, there's bound, also to be a Burger King and a Wendy's. Maybe even a White Castle (there's one in Nanuet!) or an Aunt Annie's.

If you're his driver and William Jefferson Clinton asks you or tells you to take him to Mickey D's, what are you going to say? "I'm sorry Mr. President, but that doesn't fit in with your heart healthy diet." No. You're going to say what you're supposed to say, which is "Yes, sir. I'll bring the car around right away."

And once a Big Mac o phile always a Big Mac o phile. So the guy's got to wear a leg monitor. Or take a "special sauce" Breathalyzer test now and then. Or maybe the secret service has to start analyzing security cam tapes in Westchester.

Bill -- babes -- you have the very best job on earth, Former President of the United States. Good pay, great benefits, no work, or at least no work you don't want to undertake. You don't want to blow all that by sneaking off to KFC, do you?


Shrapnel:

--Actor Kevin Smith was bounced off a commuter flight over the weekend because, said the pilot, he was too fat to fit into a "standard" seat. Southwest later apologized and gave him a McDonald's coupon book as a bonus. Smith admits he's big, but he was, he said, still able to put both armrests down and buckle the seatbelt.

--Had enough Winter yet? Well, it ain't over and neither is the snow-in-strange-places. Worry not, since it's only a few months away from saying "hot enough for ya?"

--It's understandable that the cost of living figures exclude the price of fuel and food because of extreme volatility and its effect on the statistical model. But what's hard to fathom is why they call the items left in the index its "core." What's more "core" than food and fuel?



I'm Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you're welcome to them.®
©WJR 2010

No comments: