Friday, November 11, 2011

938 Herman Cain's Blond/Blonde Problem

938 Herman Cain’s Blond/Blonde Problem

Someone’s lying.  Either that, or someone’s a total blond (as opposed to a total blonde, the distinction, originating with the Associated Press, the New York Times and other news organizations which dictate that their writers use “blonde” for women and “blond” for men.)

Herman Cain, who often acts as if he’s a stereotypical blond, says he can’t ever remember meeting one of the blonde women who accuse him of improper sexual behavior.  That’s the kind of statement you expect from, say, Goldie Hawn or Judy Holiday or Marie Wilson who gained fame and fortune for decades playing dumb blondes, but who were anything but dumb (and possibly not blondes.)

It’s the kind of statement you get from accused mobsters in court and on the witness stand.  “Do you remember when So-and-so walked into your office, pulled out a gun and demanded that you forgive his loan?”  “I do not recall that.”

So Cain likes women.  Good.  So he maybe makes “improper” advances.  Not so good, but not the end of the world.  The question is who is lying.  Cain either does or doesn’t remember the woman.  Paratroop lawyer Gloria Allred, the Al Sharpton of women’s rights, who drops behind enemy lines to defend damsels in distress, thinks Cain’s un-truthing.

Maybe.  Maybe not.  Cain blames his troubles on either his foes in the Republican Presidential primaries or Democrats who fear his candidacy or black liberals who can’t abide a black conservative.  And he makes a pretty clear statement about what he says “never happened.”  Okay.  Maybe he’s just a “blond.”

Trouble is, this woman isn’t the only one.  And she’s not the only blonde. Here’s where we can get into the whole racist baloney about black men and white women. Save it. This isn’t that.  This is just a probable case of horn-dog-wants-to-be-president-and-can’t-keep-his-zipper closed.  We’ve had that before. He may not remember the accuser, but at least he can remember three consecutive things he’s advocated.

Cain says he’ll take a lie detector test if “there is a reason.”  You can, too.  And there are countless websites that explain the shortcomings of polygraphy and how to beat a test.  If you don’t want to read up, pop a Valium first and you’ll pass.

Note to readers:  Comments on Wessay™ #937 The Fall of St. Joseph were fast in coming and there were many.  They were fairly evenly divided between favorable and unfavorable, with about 30% of the total originating in Central PA.

There were two suggestions that there should be an apology to readers, and one demand for one.  There were two death threats, one suggestion that I attempt an anatomically impossible sex act, a few “good job”s or “it’s about time someone said this stuff.”  There were several recommending an end to college football.  There were two from people who felt they had been previously maligned and sympathized with the plight of Coach Paterno, fired Wednesday evening in a phone call.  But most of them were variations of  “what a sad way to wind down a glorious career.”

Six or seven people wrote to say the real villain of this story is either circumstance or president Spanier of Penn State, also fired.  Another handful said Jerry Sandusky is being convicted in the media before he gets his day in court.  Still others say he should be run out of town on a rail.

I’m Wes Richards.  My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Please address comments and death threats to wesrichards@gmail.com
© WJR 2011

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