Go ahead, do it. Walk under a ladder. On Friday the 13th, walking under a ladder is a double negative and therefore self-cancelling.
Maybe it’ll even bring you good luck. Fear of 13 is an old story. Many tall buildings don’t have a 13th floor. They go directly from 12 to 14.
Actually, if you think about it, ANY Friday can mean bad luck in the corporate world. That’s the day they usually fire you if that’s what they’re going to do.
If you have a fish allergy, there’s no main course for Friday dinner.
Friday often is the end of the work or school week, which means the honey-do list appears with the express purpose of ruining your weekend.
On Friday, you’re that much closer to Monday.
And then if you subscribe to the Friday the 13th superstition, why isn’t a Friday the 26th twice as unlucky?
The next Friday the 26th this year takes place in September. And there’s another one in December. So get out the worry beads and make sure you have a double strand.
You’d really worry if there was a month with a Friday the 39th. Fortunately, there’s no such thing. Triple strands of worry beads are pretty awkward.
Maybe you could carry a horseshoe or a rabbit’s foot.
There are, however, no more Fridays the 13th in this year. But to make this one special, there’s a full moon tonight.
But not to worry about lack of bad luck. There’s always a ladder you can walk under. Or you can do three on a match with two other smokers. Or if a black cat crosses your path, you can try to ward off evil by keeping your fingers crossed.
About those cats… no one has ever studied whether a mostly black cat with white trim counts. Or if it does, the percentage of white or other color to black has to influence the amount of bad luck radiation. Or if a gray cat means moderately bad luck if it crosses your path.
No rabbits, horses or cats were hurt researching this little rant.
--Homeland Security, the police, the state attorney general and the immigration Service have swooped down on Asian restaurants in State College, Pennsylvania, with at least 13 people taken into custody. Bottom line: we can breathe easier now that these hardworking Chinese, Thai and Korean workers have been ferreted out and probably will be removed from our star-spangled presence. Now if they can only find some local white guys to make fake versions of our favorite Chinese, Thai and Korean Foods.
--From here, it seems they’re picking on Asians. Homeland security on the job? What do they think they’re going to find, nasty plots to do bad things? C’mon, guys, these people are making an honest living and possibly working to pay off outrageous smugglers.
I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Please address comments and accusations of racism to email@example.com
© WJR 2014