Monday, February 09, 2015

1444 One Hand Washes the Other & Needle Drop

Sign in a restaurant men’s room in Bellmore, NY: “Employees must wash hands after use. If no employee is available to wash your hands, please do it yourself.”

Very funny.

But the message is there.  And at every other restaurant everywhere.  Wash your hands.

Now comes a United States senator who says pay no attention to those signs.  You shouldn’t be forced to wash up after going to the bathroom.

He is Thom Tillis (R-NC) and he was speaking at the Bipartisan Policy Center in Washington DC.  “Too many regulations,” says the senator. Let businesses opt out.

This guy must be a worm.  Worms live in dirt. He adds that businesses that opt out should advertise that and the “market will take care of it.”

Second things second:  Do not shake hands with Thom Tillis.

Unless you’re wearing gloves.  Wearing gloves during a handshake would send Miss Manners into seizures.  But Dr. Oz might approve as long as the gloves are latex free.

Basic sanitation dictates we wash our hands thoroughly in these circumstances.  And one wonders where are the Great American advocates of “Common Sense” over “book larnin’” on this issue?

Oh, wait. Sen. Tillis is from what Jimmy Breslin calls the “low IQ States.”

Yes, folks, hand washing should be an option, not a requirement.  

And so should covering your face when you sneeze.

Of course, freedom of choice has its limits.  The borderline is where your freedom and my health or wellbeing clash.

All of which brings us to vaccinations.  And as we all know now, they’re worthless and bring about mental disorders.  Or Autism. Or beriberi. Or headache, neuritis and neuralgia. Just take a look at some of the vaccinated people who oppose vaccination.

Let’s get rid of those nasty needles and those needless potions!

That would be good for business.  More measles means more visits to the doc.  Profits!  You know doctors’ offices are almost always vacant. Why there’s hardly a patient alive anymore.  Gotta make people sick!

Polio, smallpox, chicken pox, ebola, victrola, motorola.  All good for business. While we’re at it, rickets and the plague haven’t gotten much air play lately.  Too many people are immune.

So skip those vaccinations, parents.  After all, there’s nothing like a near- death kid to generate the attention you crave.

So, the anti- science crowd gains some new momentum.  Brilliant.  And while it does, a megachurch in Texas is dealing with a measles outbreak.  The daughter of televangelist in residence Kenneth Copeland has told the so-called adults in her flock to have their kids skip the vaccine.  Now, one kid infects the next.  That’s the bad news.  The good news is that most of the minor members are home schooled which means they don’t get out much. Except to shopping malls and church.  

Lock ‘em up, those who survive, until they can no longer do any damage.  Or better yet, turn ‘em loose in the tiny hamlet of Newark, Texas, where the Copeland crowd roosts and create a localized epidemic. If conditions are right, it’ll spread to Dallas and Fort Worth where it can cause real damage.

The megachurchgoers can be made to believe it’s punishment for … well … something.  And if Copeland & co. don’t, there’s always Pat Robertson.

I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Please address comments to wesrichards@gmail.com
© WJR 2015

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