We measure everything, so why not this? How much spam landed in your email today? And what does that say about you? In a culture that values data and quantity we’ve all come to love, the more you receive, the more you are worth.
A magazine known for its lists of the most-this and the
biggest-that may be considering a list of the top spam recipients in
America. Are you a candidate?
If you receive none, are you some kind of hermit? If you receive dozens, you’re
just an ordinary drone. Hundreds? Well, now we’re starting to talk. Thousands?
Is there anyone who receives thousands?
Probably. But this raises an important question: Who
will be the first junk mail Spamillionaire? Maybe you. In fact, if you’re
a long time user of email, and keep spam, you may already have reached that
lofty figure, at least theoretically. It’s tough to know. Most people
discard junk. Most email services kill spam after a relatively short
period, 30 days. So let’s set a standard.
In order to qualify, you must have at least one million
spams in your folder consistently. That means even if Yahoo or Gmail or
Outlook automatically discards things, your total remains at least one
million. As many or more arrive even as some are automatically deleted.
There’s no TV show -- yet -- asking “Who Wants to be a
Spamillionaire?” But you can bet if this catches on, there will be.
So, the name of the game now is building your net spam
worth, increasing your take just like a hedge fund seller or an oil tycoon.
Here’s one way.
Mark stuff you already get in your regular mail as spam. The
department store, the various other merchants on your list of sites, the phone
company… all that kind of thing.
Label it spam, but don’t check “unsubscribed” if it’s
offered.
This will have three effects. Least important, you’ll
receive fewer “regular” emails. Second, it will put all that stuff into one
file where you can run through it once or twice a week, answering the ones you
put there and ignoring the rest. And most important, you will be building
your spam supply, fattening your asset and putting you at a higher level in
competing for that first Spamillionaire title.
I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome
to them. ®
Any Questions? wesrichards@gmail.com
© WR 2021
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