138 Green Level Threat
This CANNOT be! Poisoned spinach? It must be a terrorist plot!
Health officials in a bunch of states say e-coli could getcha if you eat fresh bagged spinach.
Popeye loses. Finally.
The pipe cleaner figure of Olive Oyl couldn’t do it. Pirates – nah. Not even the mighty Bluto could bring the Old Salt down. Now… his favorite dish, spinach, is his undoing. And ours.
Popeye ate canned spinach, which in the opinion of many spinach gourmets is superior to fresh. Plus it gave him opportunities to show he could squeeze a sealed can until it popped.
But just this once, he decided to buy it fresh in the bag.
So long, Popeye. Toot Toot!
This wasn’t immediately disclosed. But the spinach growers association is shocked and horrified.
One spinach maven was heard to say “we take this very seriously.”
You better believe it. There’s no telling what damage something like this can do.
And all those mommies exhorting their brats to “…eat your spinach!”
Of course, if you cook the stuff, the e-coli dies. But who wants to COOK!
Here in Out Of Service County (more about which at a future date,) a quick patrol of the leading supermarkets shows people are aware of this and are leaving spinach on the shelves.
The markets themselves are taking it off and throwing it out.
Joey at the produce counter says people are wise to this stuff… and they also take it very seriously. No one is eating spinach, Joey says. In fact, all vegetable sales are down compared with yesterday and with last week.
“Oy! You never saw such empty aisles. People aren’t eating anything green. Nothing. Nada. Zip.”
The Homeland Security Department has issued a “Condition Green Warning.”
Chief Michael “the
Word of the spinach attack sent Cheney back to his famed “undisclosed location,” and the President immediately boarded Air Force One, which continues to circle the airport in
Flight attendants jettisoned bagged spinach from the galley over
At the Popeye Home in
I'm Wes Richards, my opinions are my own, but you're welcome to them.
(c) 2006 WJR