1009 Phony Fights & Wars
The world of conflict has been taken over by the world of professional wrestling. Everyone’s fighting for or against something.
Top of the list of worsts: Politicians. They’re fighting for your freedom. They’re fighting for your rights. They’re fighting to lower your taxes. They’re fighting to restore white America to its rightful owners.
How do they do this? Like George “The Animal” Steele and Gorilla Monsoon duking it out in the squared circle after each makes a televised statement about how the other’s days are numbered.
Then, like the stage enemies they all are, they walk off in the sunset arm and arm. And guess what? Your freedom, your rights and your taxes are all about the same as they were before the three count.
The things they claim to be fighting for don’t need fights. They need work. At least some of them.
Your health insurance company is “fighting to keep you healthy.” So-and-so dies after “a long fight against cancer.” Actually, your health insurance is fighting to not pay your medical bills and so-and-so lying there while radiation and chemo drained his remaining resources was in no condition to fight. Not exactly Wrestlemania here.
Your union is fighting for your contract. Claritin is fighting your allergies. Uh... not quite. Your union may be fighting for your dues and negotiating a contract. Claritin is performing chem lab experiments in your bloodstream some of which might relieve your itchy sneezy self.
The Jets are fighting from behind hoping to overtake the Redskins in the fourth quarter. Actually, the Jets are haplessly moving the ball around hoping Washington makes enough mistakes to be overtaken. Right out of Jobber Jake’s predicted fall against John Cena, except the football game isn’t fixed. Probably.
A little peace, please. We don’t need all that fake fighting. Especially from fat slob members of congress who wouldn’t know what a fight was because they’d be on the canvas after taking the first punch.
A little peace and a little work, please. Especially from people who produce enough wind to turn the turbines when the real wind falters.
We can fight our own battles, most of us. We don’t need a designated hitter, to use another dumb jock metaphor.
--Has anyone tracked the ethnic/racial makeup of the people featured on “America’s Most Wanted?” You look at this program long enough and you conclude that every fugitive is black, Hispanic and male. Occasionally there’s white trailer trash and almost never a Caucasian guy in a suit and tie.
-- El soborno asociado wanted in Isle Cuarenta y Tres. The Holy Rollers of Walmart Mexico are said to have been paying off building permit officials left and right according to news accounts, and their headquarters counterparts have been promoting those sobornos asociados and sweeping the acts under their cheap rugs. Time for a rollback.
I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them and I’m fighting for your right to share them. ®
Please address comments to firstname.lastname@example.org
© WJR 2012
Some of today’s technology works like those five-year car batteries that conk out after five years and three weeks. But there’s a diffe...
1094 Groupthink Shlomo Tzedaka, the last Bronx Jew, is sitting in his kitchen with the usual sugar cube in his cheek and the glass of tea on...
This is the guy I knew and worked with. Young, fresh, already balding. A decent newsman and a decent human being. This was a gentleman, ...
Look at those kids. They’re taking a movement away from the timid and into the streets. There has been a coup among the leaders of the...