Friday, October 19, 2012

1085 A Tale of Three Brothels

1085  A Tale of Three Brothels

First, fellas and gals, let’s get something straight between us.  There is no such thing as a free roll in the hay, any more than there is a free lunch.

Got that?

No?

Okay, there’s always a price even though it’s not always in money.

So there’s a long tradition of trading favors.

In Kennebunk, which could be called KenneBush, they’ve arrested 29 year old Zumba instructor Alexis Wright for running a house of ill repute in her studio.  She denies it.  But if you put her name in a search block, you’ll find videos, pictures and news items that kind of wilt that denial.

Her clients are said to have been a bunch of prominent citizens in the region.  Police have released the names of the johns, and the local media have printed or broadcast them, showering some bigwigs with shame and probably leading to some high profile divorces.

Problem is, Maine being a pretty close-knit place, there are lots of guys with the same or similar first and last names and the cops and the papers didn’t think of that when they rolled the presses.

So, some men are wrongly thought of as accused.  And that’s causing some red faces in police precincts and newsrooms.


Now, to the other brothels.  These are in Greece, where a top amateur soccer team -- the Voukefalas --  is strapped for cash.  Working girls to the rescue.  In return for wearing jerseys marked “Villa Erotica” and “Soula’s House of History,” the madams are filling in the void left by the Greek financial crisis.

Patriotic prostitution.

Madam Soula, 67, told the Associated Press that she’s doing it only because she loves the game.  Probably, she meant soccer.

But she offered players a “special bonus” at her … um … headquarters if they won while wearing her House of History shirts.  Unfortunately, the V-falas team has lost four in a row.

Brothels are legal and regulated in Greece.  And they should be here, too.  Of course, if they were, we’d never have heard of Heidi Fleiss and Alexis Wright, and Eliot Spitzer would still be governor.



Shrapnel:

--Musical toys:  a Canadian company has begun selling a device that allows your acoustic guitar to sound like it’s in an echo chamber, an effect that many musicians will like.  The gizmo attaches and detaches almost instantly, requires no batteries and has no settings.  In this era, does anything this low tech have a future?

--Windows 8 is upon us.  Microsoft’s new operating system comes with the usual dazzling array of unnecessary new features and gives us ten ways to perform every task, where one or two simple good ones would suffice.  But there’s an upside, too as “8” makes it even easier for everyone to make sure you have to buy new stuff.

--If one more commentator uses the word “crisp” to describe anything but a potato chip, many of us are going to scream.  Crisp comebacks, crisp suits, crisp weather, crisp reminders, crisp performances, crisp reminders.  What’s next, Snap Crackle and Pop?

(A prize of little value is offered to the first reader who supplies the correct number of double entendres in this post.)

I’m Wes Richards.  My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Please address comments to wesrichards@gmail.com
© WJR 2012

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