Voting Advice from the Grave

1699 Voting Advice from the Grave

Here’s Today’s Quote:

-“If you agree with me on nine out of 12 things, vote for me.  If you agree with me on 12 of 12 things, see a psychiatrist.” -- Ed Koch (1924-2013)

Many people today can’t make up their minds about which candidate to vote for (or against.)  So as public service, here’s a scorecard in case you’d like help deciding.

The major party candidates are designated “A” and “B.” You can decide which one you want to put first. There is no room for the little leaguers because there’s no chance of winning.

Scorecard

Issue: A           B

Personal integrity __   __

Global warming __ __

Iran __ __

Trade agreements __   __

Tax cuts/rich __   __

Tax cuts/middle __ __   

Mexico Wall __ __  

Mexican deportation __ __

Muslim Ban __ __

Honoring Treaties __   __

Freedom of abortion choice __   __

Probable Supreme Ct. choice(s) __   __

LGTBQ rights __   __

That’s 13 issues, not twelve.  And you can adjust the standard to fit your own peculiarities.  For example, some people don’t need nine categories of agreement. Seven or eight will do.

Many Libertarian followers like to say that supporting their candidate is not throwing your vote away.  Very pure of you, fellas and girls.  Flush that toilet on principle if you must.  You’ve made a statement! It’s one that only your fellow solipsists can hear… which doesn’t matter because you’re really the only one who counts and you’ve heard it.

Some people who support the Green Party candidate say the same.  Some questions: Would you let Dr. Stein anywhere near a patient you love?  And Ajamu Baraka, nee LeRoi Jones?  Gimme a break.  The Greens also are Ever So Pure.  But they have the same solipsism problem as the Libertarians.

(More about Solipsism Wednesday.)

So now you have a scorecard. And if you’re on the fence, it may help you clarify.  But unlike your golf score, you can alter it to suit your needs without sneaking into the rough beside the 12th Green with your little pencil and trying to make it look like you didn’t erase anything.  

We can’t see you cheat.  But on the Wednesday after the election, we’ll know.

Shrapnel:

--Felonious banks when caught resort to platitudes and promises to fix things and often don’t do more than form committees and task forces that go nowhere.  Here’s an example of how they act when charged with bad taste in their ads.  A cry of outrage forced Capital One to re-do an ad in which spokesman Samuel L. Jackson’s script told him to say they pay bonus points “every damn day.”

Grapeshot:

-If they can make decent tasting decaf and perfectly good unleaded gasoline, why can’t they make whole wheat pasta that doesn’t taste like the box it comes in?

-Where does Publishers Clearing House get all that money it claims to give away when what they now sell mostly is dime store stuff without a magazine in sight?

-China has launched the world’s largest single dish radio telescope in hopes of finding intelligent life in space … few have found much of that here on earth.

-Arnold Palmer’s passing makes us wonder if maybe you shouldn’t ask your doctor if Xarelto is right for you.

I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®

Please address comments to wesrichards@gmail.com

© WJR 2016