We’ve been hearing about the stuck ship, whipped by 40 knot
winds and a sandstorm getting stuck sideways in the canal. Forty knots is about
46 miles an hour. That’s a good stiff wind in a relatively confined
space. It’s not enough to topple a decent size oak tree. It’s not
enough to send cows flying as they do in tornadoes. But in these surroundings,
it’s good enough.
About that traffic jam: Fifty or so ships use the
canal on any given day. So in three days or so, that’s a lot of heavy
metal waiting at the Cash Only line at the toll booth.
Why you may ask, don’t they place canal travel experts on
board something that big? They did. They’re as dumbfounded as anyone
else.
And why, you may ask, don’t they start taking stuff off,
loading it on smaller ships fore and aft, and sending it through? Well, consider
the weight of the cargo: 200,000 tons. That’s almost half a billion
pounds of who knows what-all.
Eventually, they’ll get the thing out of the sand.
Bring in enough tugboats, a few hundred divers. Or maybe they’ll have to
take Ever Given apart.
That of course will cause a mass movement: “Save the Ever
Given.” There’ll be campaign buttons, street art, bumper stickers.
Demonstrations. Court cases and the police festivals which seem to
accompany certain gatherings these days.
Independent filmmakers will clamor for screen rights.
Conspiracy theorists will posit that it was the work of the CIA or the
Mossad.
They’ll call for an investigation of the captain, who it
will have turned out, came to Egypt, and quit captaining lessons before they
taught the navigate-the-canal part of the course. (He knew full well, he would
never have to move this monolith out of the canal!)
The ship’s flag is Panamanian. But its owners are from
Taiwan. So the expected apologies came quickly. Say at about 40 knots.
But the knot on the waterway awaits Alexander the Great.
You want to undo this mess and Alexander the Great isn’t
available, someone call the New York office of Moran Towing.
I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome
to them. ®
Any Questions: wesrichards@gmail.com
© WR 2021
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