4723 How to Vote in Flexas
At this writing, Florida has made voting harder than ever. Texas already is the toughest state in which to vote and plans to make it even harder. Two red states. Both with their feet firmly planted in the Confederacy. Both dominated by Republicans from when Democrats stopped being Dixiecrats.
Florida’s governor went to palm beach to sign the new restrictions in a celebration sponsored by a trump fan club. Texas is still working on its version of similar restrictions. But barring a lightning strike, there’s no chance they’ll fail in the legislature or the governor won’t sign them into law.
What’s the big idea behind all this? If you ask the sponsors, they’ll tell you it’s fairness. Fairness to whom? Well… voters. If you want to sail through the line on election day, be white.
You say you are that? OK, just make sure you have all your identification papers in order and with you. Bring your own water bottle so you don’t have to ask for someone to bring you one while you’re on line in 110 degree heat. Same with sunscreen. Make sure you’re wearing some even if the line is indoors. Sunshine in Flexas penetrates roofs.
If you can’t be white, at least have a government issued i.d. Of some kind… a passport, a driver’s license. Even if the poll watcher is someone you’ve lived next to for 50 years and your kids all grew up together and played in each other’s yards.
What’s behind all this nonsense? The answer is both simple and easy. The White Knights or Republican party can’t win elections. So the next best thing is to make sure you’re one of them … or at least LOOK like one of them.
Here’s an extra tip: Don’t wear religious garb… you know… Dashikis or something that makes you look like you just got back from a pilgrimage to Mecca or those high-fashion black getups the Hasidim wear.
If you’re wearing religious accessories, make sure they’re crosses, not six-pointed stars or crescent moons. If you’re a man in a suit or sport coat, a confederate flag pin will be as good as an America flag pin. Sometimes better.
If you’re a black male, a shaved head is a threat. If you’re a white male with a skin head, well, skinheads are perfectly acceptable. Jackboots, too. But leave the Swastika armbands at home. It’s not that anyone will object, but it makes those newly empowered poll watchers uncomfortable.
See? It’s simple. Compliance is easy. As long as you’re white. And don’t worry about the obvious inconsistency of hating the government but still carrying government I.D. cards. Even if you’re a “Sovereign Citizen.”
--Bill and Melinda Gates are getting divorced. It’s “amicable.” So why do they both need lawyers?
I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Any Questions? email@example.com
© WR 2021