Monday, August 22, 2016

1684 Presidential Economics

How the presidential candidates would solve the deficit and other problems.
I. Trump

He has an amazing way to solve this yooj problem.
-a. Don’t pay back money we borrow.  The lenders should be happy with the good publicity, the patriotism and the bragging rights.  “America Turns on My Dime!”

-b. Reduce wages for federal workers.  They’re a bunch of lazy no goodniks to begin with. They don’t deserve the pay they get.  And yet they’re always there with their hands out.

-c. Abolish Obamacare, upgrade the Medicare eligibility age to 92 and tighten up all those frivolous things that are now covered and shouldn’t be because you’re going to die soon anyway.

-d. States should bear the cost of law enforcement and homeland security.  Abolish the federal departments involved.

-e. Cut taxes for job creators even if they create no jobs.

-f.  Cut taxes slightly for the middle class and they’ll vote for us regardless of all the other givebacks.


II. Clinton
She has sensible solutions for the same problems:
-a. Raise taxes on the rich and corporations to 90%.

-b. Spend the money on makework jobs fixing bridges and roads no one uses. Hire more people than needed. Do not provide machinery or tools.

-c. Make only minimum monthly payments on the Federal American Express Card.

-d. Raise the minimum wage to $29.50 per hour.

-e. Nationalize Lockheed Martin, Northrop Grumman, Boeing, Raytheon, United Tech, and General Dynamics but not Goldman Sachs.

-f. Nationalize Blue Cross/Blue Shield, Humana, Cigna, Wellpoint, Aetna and Progressive Insurance. (Note: Progressive doesn’t sell health insurance. But this way we can be rid of Flo.)

-g. Nationalize Colt, Smith & Wesson, Remington and Heritage and close them down.  

-h. Print more money.  And get more women on the bills.

III. Johnson

Johnson’s plan is the simplest of all.
-a. Freeze borrowing.

-b. Eliminate the federal government.

IV. Stein

-a. Do everything that Hillary would do.

-b. Nationalize Big Oil.

-c. Ban fossil fuel powered cars.

-d. Ban outdoor fires.

-e. Use eminent domain to erect wind turbines on all golf courses and football fields.

Shrapnel:
--Trump says the Republicans should do more to attract African Americans “...back into the party of Lincoln.” Back into? And what would Lincoln say about the 21st century version of “his” party?

Grapeshot:
-How does Sprint stay in business?

-Anyone want to start a pool on how long Trump can maintain his present presidential persona… if so, put me in for four days, which would be a record.

-Anyone believe the present presidential persona?

-Nothing gladdens the heart of bored viewers more than the closing ceremony at the Olympics.

-Mediocre ratings notwithstanding, it also probably gladdens the hearts of NBC’s accounting office.

Today’s Quote: “Your honor, I’m not a bad person, I just fell in with a bad crowd.” -- Draft of Phoenix- area sheriff Joe Arpiao’s testimony at his expected eventual sentencing hearing.

I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Please address comments to wesrichards@gmail.com
© WJR 2016

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