MINI 038 DIY

 Here’s your chance to build your own Wessay ® along with suggested keywords and phrases to help you with your final thoughts of 2021 and your hopes, dreams and plans for 2022.

--Happy

--New

--Year

--My hope 

--The hope

--For

--About

--Wish

--(Additional reporting by ______ _____ ) (replace the dashes with your name.)

--Health

--Wealth

--Love

--Peace

--Times Square

--Prosperity

--Good News

--Sickness

--Health

--Freedom

--World Series

--Superbowl

--_____ Primary (designate party and jurisdiction.)

--Biden

--Harris

--trump

--court

--jail

--prison

--Amazon.com

--SCOTUS

--Self driving car

--Passenger drone

--Dick Clark

--Local

--Locale (location not included)

--Academy Award for (insert category)

With minimal thought and effort, you can be the proud owner and author of your very own post. Maybe even a podcast! Good luck and Happy New Year from all of us here at W’s World Headquarters in Beautiful Downtown NewRoses, Pennsylvania.

I’m wesrichards@gmail.com

My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ® ©WR 2022

4748 Hopes for the New Year

 There it is.  The whole year ahead. A blank slate.  Now how are we going to fill it?  Of course, it isn’t entirely up to us. But we can all do our parts.  Some hopes from this corner:

 --The people who want freedom from protection against the Pandemic will hold a mass gathering at which they will be free to infect one another but not the rest of us.

--The people who want to soak the poor will hold their own gathering.  If the first stadium is full, a second will have about the same crowd.

--Sane people who drink will drink sanely at home.

--People who want to soak the rich will learn what compromise means, its place in this country’s history and how to use it.

--The people who are afraid of socialism will learn its definition and maybe reduce some of its fears.

--The insane drug cartels will allow sharecropping.

--The insane war on drugs will splinter into the organizational version of sharecropping and stop throwing federal tax dollars away, maybe use some of that money to freed bucks to fix a highway or extend food stamp benefits.

--Prosecutors who steadfastly refuse to allow parole or clemency or pardons for the known wrongly convicted will find a stadium of their own.

--The country’s beleaguered newspapers will earn enough from web subscriptions to hire a reporter to make telephone calls to update outdated stories that remain on their page instead of just letting them remain on their page.

--Someone will write a murder mystery without stealing the material from their files as former prosecutors or homicide cops or postal cops or railroad cops and then stop lying about any resemblance to a true story will be a coincidental.

--Megamart will wait until after Labor Day to start playing Christmas songs on their public address systems and will open the customer service desks before mid-morning.

--Science will discover a way to reduce the mosquito population without killing the whole eco system.

--No one will shoot Bambi’s dad and then not even cook and eat the carcass.

--Pigeons will learn to use public restrooms.

--No major league baseball pitcher will throw a spitball.

--No major league football player will deflate a football.

--No major sports commentator will pretend to be Mel Allen or Howard Cosell. 

--People who idolize mountain lions will come to realize they don’t roar, they “meow” although it’s a deep, loud but completely recognizable outcry.

--The Confederate States of America and its occupied territories in the mountain and desert west will stop pretending they won the War of Southern Aggression.

--And finally… Thanks to the fakely retired WestraDamus for coming out of his fake retirement to contribute his bs to this post.

I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®

Any Questions? wesrichards@gmail.com

© WR 2021

 

4747 Talk talk talk

 

Want a decent conversation? Start talking to strangers.

Not chat room strangers, real ones. Strangers on the street. On the subway. In the diner.

 

We’ve been told that the art of conversation is dead. Not even close. The art of conversation is alive and well. It’s just that your friends are boring, and your relatives have ulterior motives.

 

Let’s rewind that for a moment. Your friends aren’t necessarily boring. But you know their raps and they know yours. It’s like having the same conversation over and over again.

 

And your relatives -- well, maybe they DON’T have ulterior motives. But you know that there are certain things you can’t discuss with them, lest you raise points that’ll never be solved and that will just cause everyone grief.

 

So do this New York thing: horn in on a convo. If you’re REALLY not welcome, you’ll find out soon enough. The conversers whose territory you’ll be invading will give you the Dark Glare Of Death. Or they’ll just tell you to shove off.

Most people are too polite for that.

 

Plus, we humans are social beings, even most of the sociopaths among us, and thus are willing to talk with anyone about anything.

 

Just don’t be like the Oysters in “Alice in Wonderland.” They tried to stop a fight between the Walrus and the Carpenter and ended up becoming dinner after the combatants resumed rationality.

 

Other than that, there’s all kinds of fun and interesting stuff that can happen among people who don’t know each other and assume they will never again meet.

 

The other day at a restaurant, Iron Grey Joe was waxing poetic about a politician. In the midst of his poetic endorsement, he said something outrageously untrue. So, he got corrected.

 

The conversation then doubled to include two tables of diners instead of one.

It would have been nice to continue. But Iron Grey Joe and his poetic wax suffered a seizure or stroke or heart palpitation, and attention was turned suddenly and permanently to getting the cops and the ambulance on site and Joe to the hospital.

 

This is not a typical end to one of these horn-in-on-the-conversation conversations. Usually, you end up learning something and teaching something.

 

The opportunities for good talk, good learning and good teaching are endless, especially if there’s no ulterior motive.

 

If one of these happens at a pick up bar, it will be less spontaneous and more stilted than if it happens while waiting for the light to turn green.

 

We, remember, are as boring and same-subject as our friends and as touchy as our relatives. The way to have a fresh start every day is to … well, start fresh every day. Or every other day. Or even every week.

 

The art of conversation is not dead. It’s just sick and lacks health insurance.

 

I'm Wes Richards. My opinions are my own, but you're welcome to them.™  Any Questions? wesrichards@gmail.com (C) WR 2021

4746 No Payoff Here for Sure

 They used to say if you were out hunting with this guy, the safest place to stay was directly in front of him and close. In other facts of the day, there is absolutely, positively, definitely no truth to the murmurings that he ever had his hand out to either give or to take. Absolutely none. Ever. Guy’s as pure as the driven snow of, you know, West Virginia.

Ah, yes, West Virginia with the sixth highest poverty rate in the country.  And the fifth greatest rate of people moving out and heading for more generous states.

West Virginia, population of around the same number as Phoenix or Philadelphia. 

That’s nothing near big by world standards. When you say “big,” think Tokyo, Delhi, Shanghai, Cairo. But it still is a relatively large number of people who could use the Build Back Better bill, would not abuse it and is being prevented by one guy whose job it is to represent their interests.

 

Biden learned a lot from Obama.  One of the things he learned but shouldn’t have was leaving his spine back home when he moved into the White House.  It took eight years for Obama to relocate and reinstall. Biden doesn’t have that much time.

 

SHRAPNEL:

--Anyone taking bets on what will happen to Fox’s Jesse Waters who mentioned Fauci and “kill shot” in the same sentence? Fauci says he should be fired on the spot. Waters says he was quoted out of context.

--That whole “out of context” thing should be revisited. It’s too much like the wording of consent degrees. Those usually say “I didn’t do it and I’ll never do it again.”

--Context? Takes too much thinking and work to report. Everything is taken out of context.

 

GRAPESHOT: 

-Everything is too long to bother with these days, so we’re planning to cut these posts down from 500 to between 300 and 400 words so you can get through them faster.

-A respect-worthy newsman once called this site “hellishly productive,” which was true then but less so with the newly installed word count deficit.

-Next step may be putting keywords in UPPER CASE to make things go even faster because there’s so much else to read about or hear or view in so many other places.

 

I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®

Any Questions? wesrichards@gmail.com

© WR 2021

 

4745 In Living Bordercolor

 This space opposes the border wall with Mexico.  But things are changing so quickly here in the US, that maybe some municipalities could paint theirs. It would be helpful so we short-space travelers could know where we were and act within local laws.

Pick a color. Any color but the ones picked by any towns or villages or states or countries adjacent to your own. If all the roads in Hempstead Town, New York were one color then Hempstead Village, New York could paint its roads a different color.  Then you could consult Siri or Cortana or Hey Google or the AAA or your credit reporting agency on where you are and what the law there says about masking or vaxxing or the size of building signs.

For the technically challenged or those who fear that invisible rays cause cancer, these locales could send out US mail or have their workers hang tags on doorknobs with the latest updates. That might improve the job picture.

This isn’t as tough as it seems. The government higher-ups in every municipality probably have relatives who either are or could become paint dealers. So the graft that’s more or less universal could continue apace. Sliding money to friends and relatives is nothing new in either the public or private sectors.

“Hey Google, what are the colors of NewRoses and Moote Pointe?”

“Did you mean Neurosis?”

Well, those talking assistants aren’t all they’re cracked up to be. It’s hard for them to differentiate among You All and Y’all.  Or You Ones and Yunz or Yinz. Or You and Youse.  Bottle genies had that problem, too.  But those are other stories for other days.

This being a family-oriented site, we can’t relate the story of the one- wish mermaid.  But drop us a line if you’re not easily offended.

 Of course, there’s a problem with the whole color scheme thing.  It wouldn’t take long for people to start forgetting the actual names of places and starting to call them “Bluedale” or “Greenroad City.”

 SHRAPNEL:

--Respectable news organizations don’t use the title “doctor” to address or refer to anyone who does not have the legal right to write a prescription.  That means MDs, ODs, DOs, DDSes, DMDs and Veterinarians. The rest of the “doctor” crowd get no title or in some pompous cases “Mr.”, “Mrs.” “Miss,” or “Ms.”

 I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®

Any Questions?  wesrichards@gmail.com

© WR 2021

 

Gone Fishing

 Wessays will return monday 12/20.

4744 The Emperor's New Code

 This post is completely secure. To read it, one needs knowledge of a radical new secret code.  But, loyal readers, read on, because the key is here.

 The code is made up of the first 26 letters of the English alphabet.  The letters are used to form secret words, known only to those who visit this site.  But for the occasional or beginning reader, there is a handbook.

 If you don’t understand a particular secret word, you can look it up in the handbook, sometimes called a dictionary.  These code decoders are available only to initiates.  You know who you are, and you know where to look.

 We are taking this extraordinary step because we have realized that unauthorized persons have had the capacity to read previous posts by simply… reading them.

 Our code is unbreakable.  Unlike “https” and PlayStation 4.  The terrorists, the identity thieves and “Anonymous” the hacker ensemble know all the high tech tricks to shield their internet and telephone “chatter.”  This system, however, is absolutely foolproof.

 It’s a good thing we’re not doers of nefarious deeds because we could wreak havoc anyplace in the galaxy and no one would be the wiser.

 Since the attack on Paris, intelligence agencies around the world have let Isis know that its use of non-traditional coding is hard to follow. It’s back to school and budget overruns at the NSA, the CIA, FBI, DIA, Department of Agriculture and the school for scoundrels.

 The NSA has started training its operatives in PlayStation and Nintendo. There are advanced classes in Fisher-Price “I Can Play Piano” and historical classes in Atari, Amstrad and Saga.

 Isis is said to be preparing to create a Morse-like code in transliterated Arabic and teaching Navajo. And there are unconfirmed reports that Isis is training some of Syria’s famous carrier camels to swallow condoms having messages written in invisible laser toner and inkjet ink.

 Here at Wessays™ we have them all fooled. And our system is much easier to use than any other.  At least for some of us.

 SHRAPNEL:

We are going to have a talk with Mark Meadows, the former trumpet wrapped in confusion over the code they call “executive privilege.” He wants it both ways. Sending mountains of bs to congress and then refusing to honor a subpoena.

 I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®

Any Questions? wesrichards@gmail.com

© WR 2021