Monday, October 26, 2015

1546 A Tale of Two Canes

1546 A Tale of Two Canes
Was it Andy Benedict or George H.W. Bush who said getting old was not for wimps?  In any case, the quotation is correct.  (Actually, H.W. doesn’t speak in complete sentences, and Andy never spoke in short sentences, so maybe it was someone else.)
Now, to one of the vagaries of the human body at "this" age.  Arthritis.  Yeah, yeah, we all get it.   And yeah, yeah it's sometimes painful, even disruptively painful.  And there isn't a whole lot to be done for it.  And sometimes it goes away, sometimes it goes away and comes back for a later visit.  And sometimes it just doesn't want to leave.  Hospitality is a beautiful thing.
Oh.  Backstory.  This household follows an Asian tradition:  no outside shoes inside.  A nice idea and a good way to keep floors clean.  Sometimes it can take twelve different changes of footwear to, say, take the garbage out and then head to the basement to do laundry.  You get used to it.  There's a sense of history and tradition to it.  And you get to buy and keep footwear in sizes that guests are likely to have in addition to your own stuff.
Now the hard part:  two canes.  One for outside, one for inside.  One for use outside the house and in the garage, and another for use inside the house.  Well, most of the house.  What eludes, so far, is what to use in the basement, where separate pairs of shoes are the norm.  If you use the inside cane downstairs, is it still the "inside" cane?  The basement floor is unfinished concrete.  Technically, it's inside.  But emotionally, it isn't.  
To use the outside cane downstairs, the outside cane would have to come inside, long enough to be transported downstairs.  There aren't enough hands to do that and still carry the laundry.  So the short term solution is not using a cane, or maybe using a broom handle downstairs.
But a cane is not JUST a cane.  It is a fashion statement.  And you never know who you're going to meet in your basement, and wouldn't want to be there with a broom handle -- so peasant-like.
But owning three canes, somehow, has an air of permanence about it, that one or two don't.

Although if truth be told, not much at “this age” is permanent.

Shrapnel:

--Here’s a lesson for America’s shopping mall owners, and it comes from China where more and more shopaholics live but big centers are failing.  If you run a crummy, dilapidated property, eventually, people will stop stopping by. Pretty much anything you want is a click away.

--And was it Chris just being Chris when the governor of New Jersey was asked to leave the “Quiet Car” where phone calls are forbidden and he was mouthing off at what witnesses say was top volume?  The almost-news-service Gawker says “yes.” The guys who walk behind him with a shovel say he was in the car by mistake and left of his own free will.

I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Please address comments to wesrichards@gmail.com
© WJR 2015

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