Monday, June 10, 2019

3000 Public Punching Bags





NEW YORK (Wessays ®) -- Step outside.  Get rid of that burst of anger.  Sock it to one of New York’s art oddities and do it fast, because these things probably break some 168-year-old law that no looney lawyer has stumbled over yet. When he does, it’ll force the Department of Errant Billboards to take them down.

Or some street hotshot will show you how he can break them, break his fist, sue the city for a trillion dollars, pain and suffering.

Which brilliant New Yorker thought this up and then made his dream come true?  None. It’s from a Georgia arts and think tank called “Donttakethisthewrongway.”  

Put away the reading glasses.  It spells out Don’t take this the wrong way.”  And the punching bags which look like old time versions of the Manhattan Yellow Pages are (supposedly) part of New York Design Week.  New York Design Week is one of those fake events like Fashion Week and half the Sunday parades.  Except no one knew about this one until after it ended on May 22nd.

The punching bags are still there.  For now.  Recent news reports say anger and frustration is at a ten year high in this country.  And New Yorkers have plenty to be angry and frustrated about.

This includes but is not limited to:
--Traffic.
--Bill de Blastoff
--Congestion driving fees.
--The Subways, buses and commuter railroads.
--Ice cream trucks parked in front of fireplugs.
--Ice cream trucks that are not parked in front of fireplugs.
--Choke holds.
--Quadruple Parking Sundays on 125th Street and the Jersey Plates on the cars that do that.
--Broadway show prices.
--Memories of the Central Park Jogger debacle.
--The closing of Lord & Taylor.
--Pay toilets that don’t work.
--Pigeons.
--The high cost of everything.
--Special mention of cigarette prices -- $13 a pack as of today.
--The impending end of the Farley Post Office.
--Dog doo on the sidewalks.
--Medallion cab fares.
--Emergency rooms that don’t triage.
--Emergency rooms that DO triage… except for you.
--Potholes and no Senator Pothole to fill them.
--Roaches.
--Pigeons and their air-to-ground gift packages.
--Con Ed.
--donald trump and his merry band of bounders.
--Slum lords.
--John A. Catsimatidis.
And here’s a brand new one: The Daily News reports the city is losing thousands of dollars a year because of parking violations that “haven’t happened yet.”  Misdated summonses are routinely -- and legally -- thrown out if the date of the alleged offense hasn’t happened yet.

So, in some ways, those punching bags are heaven-sent.

Wonder what happens when you swing a Louisville Slugger at one of them. Or take a shot with your handy dandy illegal .22.  And how do they react to a stabbing?

I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Comments? Send ‘em here: wesrichards@gmail.com
© WJR 2019


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