Wow,
we got what we want. A country with no government. Anarchy, at
last.
No government?
No
laws. It’s a do-your-own-thing paradise. And historians can
now authoritatively write the final chapter because there’s no more
United States left to chronicle.
The
crimewave that swept Washington is now the (unwritten) law of the
land. Schumer, McConnell, Ryan, Pelosi, trump, all those Great
Americans? They gave you what you want.
No
government? No constitution. Second amendment yahoos no longer
need to hide behind their misinterpretations. They can simply
have entire arsenals without having to rely on anything but their
whims.
But,
of course, that sword cuts both ways. You can’t ban abortion
because you can’t ban anything.
Now
get out there and be a real American: spill drums full of oil into a
lake. Pick an ethnicity or race or sexual orientation and ban
it from your bakery. Who’s going to stop you?
Okay,
enough of that. The government really isn’t shut down. Not
entirely. The people who shut it down in the executive and
legislative branches still will be paid. The post office, a
semi-public constitutionally mandated agency -- make that the only
constitutionally mandated agency -- will continue to operate.
The
“bigger” and “more powerful” button on the oval office still
works. That’s the one that auto orders the cherry Cokes trump
drinks by the oil drum full each day. So will the other bigger
and more powerful button that will nuke Little Rocket Man. (Is he
related to Little Marco?)
The
IRS and Social Security Administrations are working. So is the FBI
and the CIA. And don’t even think of carrying a handgun onto
an airplane. Or a giant economy size tube of toothpaste.
We’ve
had this kind of shutdown before. Thank you, Newt. We’ll get over
this one too. Probably. After billions of dollars wash down the
drain.
Look
at the bright side. There are 4,000 job vacancies in the
executive branch and its agencies and departments. Think of the
money we’re saving.
With
any luck the sides will agree on something and start up the shut down
parts by the time you see this. Of course, that would mean trump and
the men and women of the house and senate would have to do actual
work over the weekend. And when was the most recent time that
happened?
SHRAPNEL:
--There’s
no real reason we still have states. But in cases like a federal
government shutdown, maybe that position is a little extreme. The
roads still will get plowed and since it’s near the end of the
month, the traffic tickets still will be issued.
--The
Huffington-less Post has ended its practice of accepting free columns
from wannabes who wanna be famous. Now called Huffpost, it’s owned
by a company that’s owned by another company that’s owned by
Verizon. Verizon worrying about the onslaught of fake news would be
better off worrying about what to do with it’s gazillion miles of
unused copper landlines.
--The
year-round population of the Wessays (™) Secret Mountain Laboratory
is three. Sixty Six percent of that population has the flu. The one
who doesn’t doesn’t usually get a flu shot because it almost
always ends with the disease full blown… which thus far it hasn’t.
TODAY’S
QUOTE:
-“You
ask professors to study things, but you never put them in charge of
anything.” --Dwight Eisenhower on learning Nixon named Henry
Kissinger national security adviser. Quoted by Niall Ferguson
in Politico Magazine.
I’m
Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Please
address comments to wesrichards@gmail.com
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sponsored content on this page is parody.
©
WJR 2018
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