Monday, May 06, 2019

2085 President By Committee



2085 President by Committee
Air Force 1-A, B and C lined up at Andrews

We should have more than one president. The current crop of Democrats inspires this thought.  Most of them are Johnnie or Janie one-notes.  Bring expertise to the table. Elect the top eleven.

We don’t know who they are yet. We will, soon enough.

“But,” you say, “we already have something like that. It’s called the cabinet.”  Yes, but recent presidencies, especially the current one, show the model is outdated.  If you have a cabinet, you have to have members who don’t need rebuilding or refinishing. Maybe a spray of Pledge, but no more. Those now holding titles are beyond repair.

If you have multiple presidents with individual skills, who needs a cabinet?  Donate the cabinet to Good Will or the Salvation Army. Or just put it out on collection day with a big sign that says “FREE.”

Why eleven, you may ask.  Well, you need an odd number so there can’t be a tie vote on things like the content of an executive order a departmental nominee or a federal judge. Looking at the Supreme Court, nine doesn’t work. Look at the House and Senate.  Large numbers don’t work.  So, eleven. A nice figure. Underused.  Can you think of set of anything that equals eleven?

Plus, America is on a diversity kick. So chances are you’d have someone for everyone in an eleven-person presidency.  You’d satisfy everyone longing for the day of a Native American or Hispanic or Transexual or gay or Jewish or Asian Presidents. A token white guy. No. A token white woman!

You’d have your standard pro-war and anti-war Democrats. You’d have your environmental democrats. Your slaves-of-Wall Street Democrats. Your Medicare-for-all Democrats. Your funny ones, your serious ones, your international relations ones, your old school, new school and no school ones.  All those positions represented with a mere handful of powerful people.

Of course, they’d have to expand the White House. No worries. There’s plenty of room on the grounds.  Maybe preserve the Residence as a tourist attraction and build a nice eleven-unit garden apartment in back. And they’d have to expand the Secret Service. And shrink the seats on Air Force One so more people could fit. Maybe re-name the plane 1-A and then add a 1-B or even a 1-C to give every member comfortable accommodations, their own gaggle of advisers and an assigned press corps.

The oval office would need some renovations. As would the Constitution.

Yes, there are some details to work out.  But we’re Americans! We’re good at details.

Now, you may ask, who runs the meetings? Ahah! A rotation of presiding officers.  There are eleven members. There are 48 months. Monthly rotation means one member would be shortchanged one turn.  To compensate, let that one leave with a Target gift card or maybe a new Chevy.

Compensation might be a problem. The salary is $400,000. Divided by eleven, that’s roughly $36,000 per person.  That’s $692.31 a week before taxes. Not a living wage. That’s okay. Being president is a duty, a calling. Plus there are a lot of perqs and freebies.  And the food is good. And the transportation.

Of course, technically you’d still have to have a cabinet.  No problem there, either. Just nominate appropriate people with decent skills and who look decent on camera.  Then build them a playground in back of the garden apartments in back of the White House.

I’m Wes Richards. My opinions are my own but you’re welcome to them. ®
Comments? Send ‘em here: wesrichards@gmail.com
© WJR 2019

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