TINYBURG PA -- It’s really hot out. Temperatures soaring near record highs. But in the world of clothing fall is here.
The simple act of locating a summer hat in mid-July becomes a chore. Shouldn’t. Does.
A straw hat that doesn’t look like a sombrero or something Dobie Gillis would wear or something that an Amish farmer might wear. You know. A straw hat.
Here in Tinyburg there are half a dozen places to buy menswear, though you’d never know it if you took the nickel tour… which you can’t because every road is under destruction. But no place in July can one buy a straw hat that doesn’t either come down over your eyes or fit like a yarmulke.
But if you want to dress like a Cossack in a great coat and fur hat… no problem. Check out the pre-season sale at Big Tiny’s Tinyburg Haberdashery.
But if you think it’s tough for a guy to get a hat, you should be more concerned about a woman trying to buy a bathing suit or a sundress or -- heaven forbid -- formalwear.
Granted, the fashion industry has to work ahead of the calendar. But that doesn’t mean there’s no call for summer wear in mid Summer.
Fashions change faster than ever these days. Time was you could figure the skirt length or the width of ties would stay in the same general square footage for a year or 18 months. Today, things change in a heartbeat and the industry has dangerously fast palpitations.
So does the automotive industry. And you can thank ex-Chrysler chair Lee Iacocca for that. He caused the creation of a computerized design center that took precious years off the time between approval of a style and its execution.
In former years, the cars for the following year generally appeared in September or October. Now, you can get a car with next year’s year tomorrow or the day after. And it’s only July.
In that speed demon design studio, they can skip many of the steps necessary during the era of the clay model and the prototype. It helps that Detroit and its European and Asian counterparts are kind of in lockstep. Example between 1986 and about 2000 every car looked like a Ford Taurus. Earlier, it was the Boxy Look. And those old enough to remember surely realize the sameness of the tail finned, be-chromed and multicolored era of the 1950s land whales.
So if you want a 2019 DeSoto, it’s there, waiting for you. But if you want a straw hat just wait until February.
“If you’re going through hell, keep going.” -- Winston Churchill.
--Interpreters do not have attorney-client or doctor-patient or clergy-confessor privileges. So where’s the push to question Marina Gross. Gross was trump’s interpreter during the private meeting with Putrid -- uh, Putin.
--The European Union is pulling a Castro on us. As we drove Fidel into the hands of the Russians, we are driving the EU into the trading arms of Japan. They will bury us… if they want to.
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